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Necrophenia

Author: Robert Rankin

Publisher: Gollancz

Published: 2008-12-01

Total Pages: 416

ISBN-13: 0575086785

ONE IN EVERY THREE PEOPLE LIVING IS ACTUALLY DEAD! It is a matter of historical record that during the latter part of World War II, England's top-secret Ministry of Serendipity enlisted the services of arch-magician Aleister Crowley to create a Homunculus. Why? Well that's a long story, spanning almost seven decades as it follows the life and career of Tyler, rock star, private eye - and notable for the fact that he almost saved Mankind. The cast of millions also includes ukulele maestro George Formby, Mick Jagger, Mama Cass, Elvis Presley and Lazlo Woodbine. And Tyler's brother, Andy, who impersonates animals (and who single-handedly brought about the Swinging Sixties). And a lady named Clara from Croydon, who unlocked the meta-phenomena of the Multiverse. And a corner shopkeeper from Brentford, who created a sitting room for God. And a great many living dead. Oh yes, and it also involves a monster in human form whose intention it is to turn the Earth into a Necrosphere, a planet totally devoid of life ...

The Brightonomicon

Author: Robert Rankin

Publisher: Gollancz

Published: 2011-06-16

Total Pages: 416

ISBN-13: 0575088192

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Our teenage hero, having been thrown from Brighton Pier by the leader of The Canvey Island Mod Squad, narrowly escapes drowning thanks to the Perfect Master, Cosmic Dick and self-styled Logos of the Aeon (not to mention the reinventer of the Ocarina), Hugo Rune Himself. Our hero has lost his memory, and, in desperation, agrees to join The Lad Himself in the solving of twelve cases based upon The Brightonomicon, the new zodiac signs formed by the alignment of Brighton streets and discovered by Rune: carriageway constellations. And together they must find the Chronovision before it falls into the wrong hands and affords ultimate power to the would-be world dictator. And this being an adventure most exciting, they must find it before the sinister Count Otto Black, would-be World Dictator and all-round bad guy. Or the whole world will all go to pot.

The Antipope

Author: Robert Rankin

Publisher: Random House

Published: 1992-02

Total Pages: 292

ISBN-13: 055213841X

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Fantasy-roman.

The Book of Ultimate Truths

Author: ROBERT. RANKIN

Publisher: Corgi

Published: 2017-06-29

Total Pages: 352

ISBN-13: 9780552173575

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He had walked the earth as Nostradamus, Uther Pendragon, Count Cagliostro and Rodrigo Borgia. He could open a tin of sardines with his teeth, strike a Swan Vesta on his chin, rope steers, drive a steam locomotive and hum all the works of Gilbert & Sullivan without becoming confused or breaking down in tears. He died, penniless, at a Hastings boarding house, in his ninetieth year. His name was Hugo Artemis Solon Saturnicus Reginald Arthur Rune, and he was never bored. Hailed as the 'guru's guru', Rune penned more than eight million words of genius including his greatest work, The Book of Ultimate Truths. But vital chapters of The Book were suppressed, chapters which could have changed the whole course of human history. Now, seventeen-year-old Cornelius Murphy, together with his best friend Tuppe, sets out on an epic quest. Their mission - recover the missing chapters. Re-publish The Book of Ultimate Truths. And save the world.

Web Site Story

Author: Robert Rankin

Publisher: Random House

Published: 2001

Total Pages: 388

ISBN-13: 0552147435

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They wrote it off as a scare story. The Millennium Bug was the non-event of the 20th century. But they were wrong, because the bug was real. It's a computer virus and it's about to do a deadly species cross-over, from machine to mankind.

The Bridge to Never Land

Author: Dave Barry

Publisher: Disney Electronic Content

Published: 2011-08-09

Total Pages: 448

ISBN-13: 1423163079

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One summer morning while Aidan and Sarah are visiting their grandfather, they discover a secret compartment in his battered wooden desk. Inside is a yellowed envelope that contains a piece of very thin, almost translucent, white paper, on which, handwritten in black ink, are a series of seemingly random lines; among them are what appear to be fragments of letters, but not enough to make sense. At the bottom of the page is a verse about Peter Peter and a reference to a real hotel in London. As it happens, the family is about to embark on a trip to Europe, so the children decide that while in London, they will try to locate the hotel.

The Toyminator

Author: Robert Rankin

Publisher: Hachette UK

Published: 2011-06-02

Total Pages: 328

ISBN-13: 0575088214

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Somewhere over the rainbow and just off the Yellow Brick Road stands Toy City, formerly known as Toy Town. And things are not going well for the city's inhabitants. There have been outbreaks of STC - Spontaneous Toy Combustion - and there are strange signs and portents in the Heavens. Preachers of Toy City's many religions are predicting that the End Times are approaching and that a Toy City Apocalypse will soon come to pass. But can this possibly be true, or is there a simple explanation - an alien invasion, for instance. With the body count rising and the forces of law and order baffled, it is the time for a hero to step forward and attempt to save the day. Well, two heroes actually, Eddie Bear, Toy City Private Eye and his loyal sidekick, Jack: our courageous twosome are about to face their biggest challenge yet, to save not only toykind, but the world of mankind too. Which should keep them out of the pub for a while.

The Japanese Devil Fish Girl and Other Unnatural Attractions

Author: Robert Rankin

Publisher: Gollancz

Published: 2010-09-09

Total Pages: 261

ISBN-13: 0575086807

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The pickled Martian's tentacles are fraying at the ends and Professor Coffin's Most Meritorious Unnatural Attraction (the remains of the original alien autopsy, performed by Sir Frederick Treves at the London Hospital) is no longer drawing the crowds. It's 1895; nearly a decade since Mars invaded Earth, chronicled by H.G. Wells in THE WAR OF THE WORLDS. Wrecked Martian spaceships, back-engineered by Charles Babbage and Nikola Tesla, have carried the Queen's Own Electric Fusiliers to the red planet, and Mars is now part of the ever-expanding British Empire. The less-than-scrupulous sideshow proprietor likes Off-worlders' cash, so he needs a sensational new attraction. Word has reached him of the Japanese Devil Fish Girl; nothing quite like her has ever existed before. But Professor Coffin's quest to possess the ultimate showman's exhibit is about to cause considerable friction amongst the folk of other planets. Sufficient, in fact, to spark off Worlds War Two.

The Hollow Chocolate Bunnies of the Apocalypse

Author: Robert Rankin

Publisher: Gollancz

Published: 2011-06-16

Total Pages: 262

ISBN-13: 0575088206

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A hilarious comic fantasy from the bestselling cult creator of the Brentford Triangle Trilogy Once upon a time Jack set out to find his fortune in the big city. But the big city is Toy City, formerly known as Toy Town, and it has grown considerably since the good old days and isn't all that jolly any more. And there is a serial killer loose on the streets. The old, rich nursery rhyme characters are being slaughtered one by one and the Toy City police are getting nowhere in their investigations. Meanwhile, Private Eye Bill Winkie has gone missing, leaving behind his sidekick Eddie Bear to take care of things. Eddie may be a battered teddy with an identity crisis, but someone's got to stop the killer. When he teams up with Jack, the two are ready for the challenge. Not to mention the heavy drinking, bad behaviour, car chases, gratuitous sex and violence, toy fetishism and all-round grossness along the way. It's going to be an epic adventure!

The Mechanical Messiah and Other Marvels of the Modern Age

Author: Robert Rankin

Publisher: Gollancz

Published: 2012-09-11

Total Pages: 0

ISBN-13: 9780575086388

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Colonel Katterfelto has lately returned to London. He departed America under something of a cloud ... of smoke, issuing from his Spiritual Laboratory, which the townsfolk of Wormcast, Arizona, marched upon with their flaming torches. This catastrophic conflagration caused considerable concern to the pious colonel, who had been engaged in the creation of 'Heaven's last and best gift to Mankind', The Mechanical Messiah. And he was, after all, being guided in this Great Work by holy angels, communicating to him through his monkey butler, Darwin. It is 1897, twelve years since The War of the Worlds and two since Worlds War Two*. The British Empire encompasses Mars, and an uneasy peace exists between the peoples of Venus, Jupiter and Earth. In London there are many marvels of the modern age to be experienced. Amongst these is The Electric Alhambra Music Hall, where crowds thrill to The Earl Grey Whistle Test, a musical extravaganza featuring such top turns as Hayward's Acrobatic Kiwis, The Travelling Formbys and the newly-arrived Colonel Katterfelto's Clockwork Minstrels. But all is far from well in old Whitechapel, where a monster is once more abroad in the night-time streets, committing hideous acts of murder. Can this be the return of Jack the Ripper, or has something altogether unearthly materialised to spread fear, panic and mayhem? Something Hellishly evil? Famed consulting detective Cameron Bell is already on the case, but it may take nothing less than the New Messiah Himself to save London, The Empire and all of the solar system from the impending apocalypse! 'Stark raving genius' Observer *See The Japanese Devil Fish Girl and other Unnatural Attractions.