Validate Me! (How my mom's hoarding kind of messed me up.)

Validate Me! (How my mom's hoarding kind of messed me up.) PDF

Author: Melissa Patton

Publisher: Lulu.com

Published: 2014-04-30

Total Pages: 118

ISBN-13: 1304957748

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Compulsive hoarding damages house structures, threatens safety and health, drains bank accounts, and estranges a hoarder from the rest of society. It goes way beyond just saving stuff. It goes deeper than just being a pack-rat. It is a very real disorder, and it affects more than the hoarder. In this brief memoir, Melissa shares her struggles growing up as the daughter of a hoarder, her reality TV experience and the events that followed, and her journey through the therapy she did not realize she needed. "Validate Me! (How my mom's hoarding kind of messed me up.)" opens your eyes to the most important "things" that get destroyed under the piles.

Children of Hoarders

Children of Hoarders PDF

Author: Fugen Neziroglu

Publisher: New Harbinger Publications

Published: 2013-11-01

Total Pages: 203

ISBN-13: 1608824403

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Growing up with a hoarder can be a confusing, painful, and sometimes dangerous experience. And when it comes to finding help for a hoarder parent, many adult children find themselves taking on the exhausting role of caretaker. As the child of a hoarder, you may be wondering what resources are available to you. Written by nationally recognized obsessive compulsive disorder (OCD) expert Fugen Neziroglu, a regular on the popular TLC television series, Hoarders, Children of Hoarders explores strategies for communicating with hoarder parents and outlines practical intervention skills. In addition, the book shows readers how to let go of the personal shame and guilt associated with being the child of a hoarder. Using mindfulness, acceptance, assertiveness and validation skills, this is the first book written specifically for adult children of hoarders that focuses on the interpersonal effects of hoarding. Inside, you will learn to communicate with your loved ones in a way that minimizes conflict, while still dealing with the logistical and organizational issues that arise when living with or witnessing hoarding behavior. The book also includes tips for reclaiming living space, strategies for ensuring that the health and safety of residents is not compromised by the hoarder’s living conditions, and organizational tactics for sorting through the clutter after the death of a parent who hoards. As the child of a hoarder, sometimes it can be helpful to know that you are not alone. In Children of Hoarders, you will get the support that you need to deal with your hoarder parent, and reclaim your own life in the process.

Dirty Secret

Dirty Secret PDF

Author: Jessie Sholl

Publisher: Simon and Schuster

Published: 2010-12-28

Total Pages: 336

ISBN-13: 9781439192535

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A fascinating look at compulsive hoarding by a woman whose mother suffers from the disease. To be the child of a compulsive hoarder is to live in a permanent state of unease. Because if my mother is one of those crazy junk-house people, then what does that make me? When her divorced mother was diagnosed with cancer, New York City writer Jessie Sholl returned to her hometown of Minneapolis to help her prepare for her upcoming surgery and get her affairs in order. While a daunting task for any adult dealing with an aging parent, it’s compounded for Sholl by one lifelong, complex, and confounding truth: her mother is a compulsive hoarder. Dirty Secret is a daughter’s powerful memoir of confronting her mother’s disorder, of searching for the normalcy that was never hers as a child, and, finally, cleaning out the clutter of her mother’s home in the hopes of salvaging the true heart of their relationship—before it’s too late. Growing up, young Jessie knew her mother wasn’t like other mothers: chronically disorganized, she might forgo picking Jessie up from kindergarten to spend the afternoon thrift store shopping. Now, tracing the downward spiral in her mother’s hoarding behavior to the death of a long-time boyfriend, she bravely wades into a pathological sea of stuff: broken appliances, moldy cowboy boots, twenty identical pairs of graying bargain-bin sneakers, abandoned arts and crafts, newspapers, magazines, a dresser drawer crammed with discarded eyeglasses, shovelfuls of junk mail . . . the things that become a hoarder’s “treasures.” With candor, wit, and not a drop of sentimentality, Jessie Sholl explores the many personal and psychological ramifications of hoarding while telling an unforgettable mother-daughter tale.

White Walls

White Walls PDF

Author: Judy Batalion

Publisher: Penguin

Published: 2016-01-05

Total Pages: 352

ISBN-13: 0698183681

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A memoir of mothers and daughters, hoarding, and healing. Judy Batalion grew up in a house filled with endless piles of junk and layers of crumbs and dust; suffocated by tuna fish cans, old papers and magazines, swivel chairs, tea bags, clocks, cameras, printers, VHS tapes, ballpoint pens…obsessively gathered and stored by her hoarder mother. The first chance she had, she escaped the clutter to create a new identity—one made of order, regimen, and clean white walls. Until, one day, she found herself enmeshed in life’s biggest chaos: motherhood. Confronted with the daunting task of raising a daughter after her own dysfunctional childhood, Judy reflected on not only her own upbringing but the lives of her mother and grandmother, Jewish Polish immigrants who had escaped the Holocaust. What she discovered astonished her. The women in her family, despite their differences, were even more closely connected than she ever knew—from her grandmother Zelda to her daughter of the same name. And, despite the hardships of her own mother-daughter relationship, it was that bond that was slowly healing her old wounds. Told with heartbreaking honesty and humor, this is Judy’s poignant account of her trials negotiating the messiness of motherhood and the indelible marks that mothers and daughters make on each other’s lives.

The Secret Lives of Hoarders

The Secret Lives of Hoarders PDF

Author: Matt Paxton

Publisher: Penguin

Published: 2011-05-03

Total Pages: 219

ISBN-13: 1101514884

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On the front lines with extreme hoarders The Secret Lives of Hoarders is much more than harrowing tales of attacking the ugliest, dirtiest, and most shocking hoarding cases in the country. It is a behind-the-scenes look at this hidden epidemic- what it means, how to recognize it before it gets out of hand, and how to deal with it. Through his work with hundreds of clients in the worst circumstances- from the giant "rat's nest" that hid more than $13,000 in cash to a vast cache of cartoon pornography to twenty-five years' worth of unopened mail-Matt Paxton has learned to understand this disorder and his clients' impulses to collect, to speak the hoarders' language, and to reach out to them with compassion and concern while avoiding criticism and judgment. Most important, he guides compulsive hoarders successfully through every step of the clean-up and healing process. The Secret Lives of Hoarders is an engrossing and sometimes unsettling look at extreme clutter but one that helps hoarders, their families, and their friends to find meaning in the chaos.

Stuff

Stuff PDF

Author: Randy O. Frost

Publisher: Houghton Mifflin Harcourt

Published: 2010-04-20

Total Pages: 309

ISBN-13: 0547487258

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The New York Times bestseller. “Gripping . . . By turns fascinating and heartbreaking . . . Stuff invites readers to reevaluate their desire for things.”—Boston Globe “Amazing . . . utterly engrossing . . . Read it.”—The Washington Post Book World What possesses someone to save every scrap of paper that’s ever come into his home? What compulsions drive a person to sacrifice her marriage or career for an accumulation of seemingly useless things? Randy Frost and Gail Steketee were the first to study hoarding when they began their work a decade ago. They didn’t expect that they would end up treating hundreds of patients and fielding thousands of calls from the families of hoarders. Their vivid case studies (reminiscent of Oliver Sacks) in Stuff show how you can identify a hoarder—piles on sofas and beds that make the furniture useless, houses that can be navigated only by following small paths called goat trails, vast piles of paper that the hoarders “churn” but never discard, even collections of animals and garbage—and illuminate the pull that possessions exert over all of us. Whether we’re savers, collectors, or compulsive cleaners, very few of us are in fact free of the impulses that drive hoarders to extremes. “Authoritative, haunting, and mysterious. It is also intensely, not to say compulsively readable.”—Tracy Kidder, Pulitzer Prize-winning author “Fascinating . . . a good mix of cultural and psychological theories on hoarding.”—Newsweek “Pioneering researchers offer a superb overview of a complex disorder that interferes with the lives of more than six-million Americans . . . An absorbing, gripping, important report.”—Kirkus Reviews (starred review)

Buried in Treasures

Buried in Treasures PDF

Author: David Tolin

Publisher: Oxford University Press

Published: 2013-10-18

Total Pages: 200

ISBN-13: 0199329273

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While most people find it relatively easy to manage their possessions, some find it extremely difficult. If you have a problem resisting the urge to acquire and you find your home cluttered and filled to capacity with items many people would find useless and unnecessary, you may suffer from a condition known as hoarding disorder. Hoarding is a behavioral problem consisting of clutter, difficulty discarding items, and excessive buying or acquiring. Hoarding is often associated with significant reduction in quality of life, and in extreme cases, it can pose serious health risks. If you or a loved one has hoarding disorder, this book can help. This fully updated Second Edition of Buried in Treasures outlines a scientifically based, effective program for helping those with hoarding disorder dig their way out of the clutter and chaos of their homes. Written by scientists and practitioners who are leaders in studying and treating hoarding disorder, this book outlines a program of skill-building, learning to think about possessions in a different way, and gradual challenges to help people manage their clutter and their lives. It also provides useful information for family and friends of people who hoard, as they struggle to understand and help. Discover the reasons for your problems with acquiring, saving, and hoarding, and learn new ways of thinking about your possessions so you can decide what you really need and what you can do without. Learn to identify the "bad guys" that cause and maintain your hoarding behavior and meet the "good guys" who can help motivate you and put you on the path to change. Useful self-assessments will help you determine the severity of your problem. Training exercises, case examples, organizing tips, and motivation boosters help change the way you think and behave toward your possessions. This book provides easy-to-understand strategies and techniques that anyone can use.

I Love Jesus, But I Want to Die

I Love Jesus, But I Want to Die PDF

Author: Sarah J. Robinson

Publisher: WaterBrook

Published: 2021-05-11

Total Pages: 257

ISBN-13: 0593193539

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A compassionate, shame-free guide for your darkest days “A one-of-a-kind book . . . to read for yourself or give to a struggling friend or loved one without the fear that depression and suicidal thoughts will be minimized, medicalized or over-spiritualized.”—Kay Warren, cofounder of Saddleback Church What happens when loving Jesus doesn’t cure you of depression, anxiety, or suicidal thoughts? You might be crushed by shame over your mental illness, only to be told by well-meaning Christians to “choose joy” and “pray more.” So you beg God to take away the pain, but nothing eases the ache inside. As darkness lingers and color drains from your world, you’re left wondering if God has abandoned you. You just want a way out. But there’s hope. In I Love Jesus, But I Want to Die, Sarah J. Robinson offers a healthy, practical, and shame-free guide for Christians struggling with mental illness. With unflinching honesty, Sarah shares her story of battling depression and fighting to stay alive despite toxic theology that made her afraid to seek help outside the church. Pairing her own story with scriptural insights, mental health research, and simple practices, Sarah helps you reconnect with the God who is present in our deepest anguish and discover that you are worth everything it takes to get better. Beautifully written and full of hard-won wisdom, I Love Jesus, But I Want to Die offers a path toward a rich, hope-filled life in Christ, even when healing doesn’t look like what you expect.

The House We Grew Up In

The House We Grew Up In PDF

Author: Lisa Jewell

Publisher: Simon and Schuster

Published: 2014-08-12

Total Pages: 416

ISBN-13: 1476703019

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From the New York Times bestselling author of Then She Was Gone… OUR HOUSE. OUR FAMILY. OUR SECRETS. Meet the picture-perfect Bird family: pragmatic Meg, dreamy Beth, and towheaded twins Rory and Rhys, one an adventurous troublemaker, the other his slighter, more sensitive counterpart. Their father is a sweet, gangly man, but it’s their beautiful, free-spirited mother Lorelei who spins at the center. In those early years, Lorelei tries to freeze time by filling their simple brick house with precious mementos. Easter egg foils are her favorite. Craft supplies, too. She hangs all of the children’s art, to her husband’s chagrin. Then one Easter weekend, a tragedy so devastating occurs that, almost imperceptibly, it begins to tear the family apart. Years pass and the children have become adults, while Lorelei has become the county’s worst hoarder. She has alienated her husband and children and has been living as a recluse. But then something happens that beckons the Bird family back to the house they grew up in—to finally understand the events of that long-ago Easter weekend and to unearth the many secrets hidden within the nooks and crannies of home.

Digging Out

Digging Out PDF

Author: Michael A. Tompkins

Publisher: New Harbinger Publications

Published: 2009

Total Pages: 210

ISBN-13: 1572245948

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In Digging Out, two psychologists who specialize in compulsive hoarding show readers with a friend or family member who hoards how to use harm reduction, a proven-effective model, to help their loved one live safely and comfortably in his or her own home and improve their relationship with the hoarder.