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Author: Ken Derby
Publisher:
Published: 2014-04-05
Total Pages: 0
ISBN-13: 9780615974194
DOWNLOAD EBOOK →Follows the humorous attempts of fifth grader Anthony "Tony Baloney" Madison to become a guest on his favorite television show, "The Late Show with David Letterman."
Author: Kenneth Derby
Publisher:
Published: 2004
Total Pages: 0
ISBN-13: 9780823418510
DOWNLOAD EBOOK →The Top 10 Ways to Ruin the First Day of 5th Grade Fifth-grader Anthony Madison, a.k.a. Tony Baloney, can't get enough of the Late Show with David Letterman. He loves the jokes, the silly routines, and most of all the top ten lists Dave features night after night; and Tony will stop at nothing to get himself on the program. He's even devising his own repertoire of Stupid Human Tricks and top ten lists (such as "The Top 10 Way to Ruin the First Day of 5th Grade, #1: Get your foot stuck in a toilet in the boys' restroom and have to be rescued by the 911 guys") sure to put him next in line as Dave's replacement. But to get all the way from Kansas to the big time in New York City, he will have to pull out all the stops. With his own brand of top ten lists, and stunts that range from photocopying his hinder to taking to the field in a bear suit at a professional football game, Tony Baloney takes his friends, family, and readers on a uproarious and wild ride to remember.
Author: Kenneth Derby
Publisher: Scholastic Paperbacks
Published: 2006-07
Total Pages: 180
ISBN-13: 9780439823227
DOWNLOAD EBOOK →Fifth-grader Anthony Madison, a.k.a. Tony Baloney, can't get enough of The Late Show with David Letterman. He loves the jokes, the silly routines, and most of all the top ten lists-and Tony will stop at nothing to get himself on the program. He's even devising his own repertoire of Stupid Human Tricks and top ten lists sure to put him next in line as Dave's replacement. But to get all the way from Kansas to the big time in New York City, he will have to pull out all the stops. Tony Baloney takes his friends, family, and teachers on an uproarious and wild ride to remember.
Author: Kenneth Derby
Publisher:
Published: 2005
Total Pages: 0
ISBN-13:
DOWNLOAD EBOOK →Follows the humorous attempts of fifth grader Anthony "TB" Madison to become a guest on his favorite television show, "The Late Show with David Letterman."
Author: Ken Derby
Publisher:
Published: 2012-11-01
Total Pages: 134
ISBN-13: 9780615710617
DOWNLOAD EBOOK →Over 122,000 copies in print! Originally published as The Top 10 Ways to Ruin the First Day of 5th Grade, but now it has a new cover and a new title, The Top 10 Ways to Ruin the First Day of School. It is the same humorous book with the same humorous story that kids love! An International Reading Association and Children's Book Council "Children's Choices" Honor Book An Alabama "Children's Choice Book Award Program" Winner "Nonstop wacky action." - School Library Journal "A quick, fun read that will appeal to would-be show-offs everywhere." - Booklist "This very funny, very silly book is filled with kids, teachers and parents who will make you laugh - when you're not chuckling about Tony's latest antics." -The Washington Post Summary: Anthony Madison, a.k.a. Tony Baloney, can't get enough of the Late Show with David Letterman. He loves the Late Show and will stop at nothing to get himself on the program. But to get from Kansas City to New York City, he'll have to pull out all the stops. With his own brand of Top Ten lists, and stunts that range from photocopying his hinder to taking to the field in a bear suit at a professional football game, Tony takes the NFL, MTV, New York City, the Hells Angels, his teacher, friends, family, and readers on an uproarious ride to remember. Hey kids! Have fun submitting your own hilarious Top Ten lists online at Top Ten School! And . . . you can become an official member of the Top Ten Rockers at Top Ten School! Hardcover originally published by Holiday House.Paperback originally published by Scholastic.Paperback re-released by Illusion Publishing.
Author: Anthony Esolen
Publisher: Simon and Schuster
Published: 2023-07-18
Total Pages: 213
ISBN-13: 1684516579
DOWNLOAD EBOOK →Play dates, soccer practice, day care, political correctness, drudgery without facts, television, video games, constant supervision, endless distractions: these and other insidious trends in child rearing and education are now the hallmarks of childhood. As author Anthony Esolen demonstrates in this elegantly written, often wickedly funny book, almost everything we are doing to children now constricts their imaginations, usually to serve the ulterior motives of the constrictors. Ten Ways to Destroy the Imagination of Your Child takes square aim at these accelerating trends, in a bitingly witty style reminiscent of C. S. Lewis, while offering parents—and children—hopeful alternatives. Esolen shows how imagination is snuffed out at practically every turn: in the rearing of children almost exclusively indoors; in the flattening of love to sex education, and sex education to prurience and hygiene; in the loss of traditional childhood games; in the refusal to allow children to organize themselves into teams; in the effacing of the glorious differences between the sexes; in the dismissal of the power of memory, which creates the worst of all possible worlds in school—drudgery without even the merit of imparting facts; in the strict separation of the child’s world from the adult’s; and in the denial of the transcendent, which places a low ceiling on the child’s developing spirit and mind. But Esolen doesn’t stop at pointing out the problem; he offers clear solutions as well. With charming stories from his own boyhood and an assist from the master authors and thinkers of the Western tradition, Ten Ways to Destroy the Imagination of Your Child is a welcome respite from the overwhelming banality of contemporary culture. Interwoven throughout this indispensable guide to child rearing is a rich tapestry of the literature, music, art, and thought that once enriched the lives of American children. Ten Ways to Destroy the Imagination of Your Child confronts contemporary trends in parenting and schooling by reclaiming lost traditions. This practical, insightful book is essential reading for any parent who cares about the paltry thing that childhood has become, and who wants to give a child something beyond the dull drone of today’s culture.
Author: Ben Stein
Publisher: ReadHowYouWant.com
Published: 2010-07
Total Pages: 318
ISBN-13: 145877659X
DOWNLOAD EBOOK →How to Ruin Your Life is a powerful self-help tool in the form of a work of humor. It is sardonic advice, presented with tongue in cheek, explaining how people can ''ruin' their lives. The essays cover topics such as ''Convince Yourself That Youre All That Matters,' Think the Worst of Everyone,' ''Pour Salt on Those Wounds,' and ''You Can Change People.' Seriously, though, to anyone who reads this book, it is an earnest warning about falling into traps of self-destructive behavior that can ruin any man or womans life. More than that, it comprises 35 steps that - if read and understood - provide a road map to making life work in the most effective way possible. It is humor and self-help all in one, delivered by Ben Stein, a man who has witnessed more than his share of people who did ruin their lives - as well as those whose lives have been wildly successful.
Author: Mary McHugh
Publisher: Andrews McMeel Publishing
Published: 2004
Total Pages: 150
ISBN-13: 9780740747083
DOWNLOAD EBOOK →Men may be from Mars and women from Venus, but the alien known as teenager comes from a place way beyond those two. What else would account for that incredible transformation from loving child to the hostile creature who wants zilch to do with dear old Mom and Dad? How to Ruin Your Children's Lives is a survival manual for enduring this transmutation and-with a little luck-maintaining enough sanity to one day hear those longed-for words, Hey, I guess you weren't so stupid after all.Purple hair? Belly rings? Bizarre musical tastes? Not a problem as long as readers have How to Ruin Your Children's Lives' nearly 300 tips and tactics close at hand. With resident teenagers slamming doors and screaming at the top of their lungs, Mom! You're ruining my life! parents should at least make certain they're handling the job with aplomb.Consider these tips: o Call them at their friend's house to ask if they want lasagna for dinner.o Ask them about girlfriends (or boyfriends) in front of relatives.o Tell them about the time you streaked when you were in college.o Sing old Beatles songs when their friends are in the car.o Dress like Christina Aguilera.Author Mary McHugh is right on target. She shows parents how to match attitude with attitude and how to carry on whether the teen-parent subject is sex, using the family car, grades, or curfews. This book's perfect for any parent in the trenches and for empty nesters trying to stem their tears.
Author: Ken Derby
Publisher:
Published: 2013-09-06
Total Pages: 102
ISBN-13: 9780615872285
DOWNLOAD EBOOK →Another hilarious first-day-of-school story from International Reading Association and Children's Book Council "Children's Choices" award winning author, Ken Derby! "Don't read this book if you are nervous about falling off a chair or out of bed when you are reading. This is a very funny story and sure to be a big hit!" -JOHANNA HURWITZ, award-winning author of more than sixty popular books for children Harley Patrick Davidsun, the zany biker/rocker/teacher dude from The Top 10 Ways to Ruin the First Day of School, is back! And his classroom is not what one would call "traditional." He's nicknamed it "The Fourth Grade Loony Bin," and that's exactly what it is, especially when he pits the boys against the girls in a contest to win a ride on his chopped motorcycle. Humorous events - ranging from a flatulence test to Kiss-A-Mania - mean you'll never know what's going to happen next. So step into the Loony Bin and find out who wins the wacky contest. You'll be glad you went along for the ride! WARNING! Many things in this story are totally outrageous, and adults will say that such things could never happen in real life. But what do they know? Maybe somewhere, in some distant school, there really is a teacher like Harley P. Davidsun. At least, let's hope so.
Author: Steve Farrar
Publisher: Moody Publishers
Published: 2012-04-01
Total Pages: 144
ISBN-13: 0802483364
DOWNLOAD EBOOK →We all have an internal alarm clock that goes off when we're about to make a bad decision... Some of us spend our 20's hitting the snooze button. By taking a look at 9 common, everyday mistakes, which most of us have an opportunity to make on a regular basis, Steve Farrar speaks with wisdom and wit in this short book that serves as a wake up call we should all take. From starting our 20's on the wrong foot to neglecting our own gifts and strengths, and from isolating ourselves from real community to ignoring God's purpose for our lives, How to Ruin Your Life by 30 will help navigate these treacherous waters we call adulthood. No matter where you are at: preparing for, recovering from, or in the midst of your 20's... this short book will help.
