The Best Ever Book of Real Estate Jokes

The Best Ever Book of Real Estate Jokes PDF

Author: Mark Geoffrey Young

Publisher: CreateSpace

Published: 2011-12-12

Total Pages: 106

ISBN-13: 9781468076349

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If you've ever heard a Jewish, Blond, Italian, Irish, Blond, Libyan, Catholic, Mexican, Polish, Australian, Norwegian, or an Essex Girl, Newfie, Mother-in-Law, or joke aimed at a minority, this book of real estate agent jokes is for you. In this not-so-original book, The Best Ever Book of Real Estate Agent Jokes; Lots and Lots of Jokes Specially Repurposed for You-Know-Who, Mark Young takes a whole lot of tired, worn out jokes and makes them funny again. The book of Real Estate Agent jokes is so unoriginal, it's original. And, if you don't burst out laughing from at least one accountant joke in this book, there's something wrong with you.This book has so many Real Estate Agent jokes, you won't know where to start. For example:Why do Real Estate Agents wear slip-on shoes? You need an IQ of at least 4 to tie a shoelace.***A Real Estate Agent and his wife were sitting around the breakfast table one lazy Sunday morning. The Real Estate Agent turned to his wife and said: “When I die, I want you to sell all my stuff.”“Why would you want me to do that?,” asked his wife.“I figure that you'll eventually remarry, and I don't want some asshole using my stuff,” replied the Real Estate Agent.The Real Estate Agent's spouse said: “What makes you think I'd marry another asshole?”***Did you hear about the Real Estate Agent who wore two jackets when he painted his house?The instructions on the can said: “Put on two coats.”***Why do Real Estate Agents laugh three times when they hear a joke? Once when it is told, once when it is explained to them, and once when they understand it.

We Had a Little Real Estate Problem

We Had a Little Real Estate Problem PDF

Author: Kliph Nesteroff

Publisher: Simon and Schuster

Published: 2022-02-15

Total Pages: 336

ISBN-13: 1982103051

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"From renowned comedy journalist and historian Kliph Nesteroff comes the underappreciated story of Native Americans and comedy"--

The Shadow Cipher

The Shadow Cipher PDF

Author: Laura Ruby

Publisher: Walden Pond Press

Published: 2017

Total Pages: 430

ISBN-13: 9781536438963

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A debut entry in an alternate-history series depicts three kids who try to solve a modern-world puzzle and complete a treasure hunt laid into the streets and buildings of New York City.

A Load of Hooey

A Load of Hooey PDF

Author: Bob Odenkirk

Publisher: McSweeney's

Published: 2014-10-07

Total Pages: 93

ISBN-13: 1940450667

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Bob Odenkirk is a legend in the comedy-writing world, winning Emmys and acclaim for his work on Saturday Night Live, Mr. Show with Bob and David, and many other seminal TV shows. This book, his first, is a spleen-bruisingly funny omnibus that ranges from absurdist monologues (“Martin Luther King, Jr’s Worst Speech Ever”) to intentionally bad theater (“Hitler Dinner Party: A Play”); from avant-garde fiction (“Obituary for the Creator of Madlibs”) to free-verse poetry that's funnier and more powerful than the work of Calvin Trillin, Jewel, and Robert Louis Stevenson combined. Odenkirk's debut resembles nothing so much as a hilarious new sketch comedy show that’s exclusively available as a streaming video for your mind. As Odenkirk himself writes in “The Second Coming of Jesus and Lazarus,” it is a book “to be read aloud to yourself in the voice of Bob Newhart.”

How to Invest in Real Estate

How to Invest in Real Estate PDF

Author: Brandon Turner

Publisher: Biggerpockets Publishing, LLC

Published: 2018-10-31

Total Pages: 280

ISBN-13: 9780997584707

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Over the many years that we've been serving real estate investors, one of the most asked questions on our site has been, "How Do I Get Started in Real Estate Investing?" New investors will love the fundamentals and even experienced investors will appreciate the high-level view of strategies they may have never even considered. Don't let some guru tell you what the right path is for you. Read How to Invest in Real Estate and see all the paths in one place, so you can make the best choice for you, your family, and your financial future. This book will help new investors get a firm foundation to build their investing business upon. With topics ranging from how to gain a solid real estate education, real estate niches, financing, marketing, and more, this book is truly the definitive guide for helping new investors learn the ropes.

The Best Ever Book of Insurance Agent Jokes

The Best Ever Book of Insurance Agent Jokes PDF

Author: Mark Geoffrey Young

Publisher: CreateSpace

Published: 2013-07

Total Pages: 106

ISBN-13: 9781490585352

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If you've ever heard a Jewish, Italian, Irish, Libyan, Catholic, Mexican, Polish, Norwegian, or an Essex Girl, Newfie, Mother-in-Law, or joke aimed at a minority, this book of Insurance Agent jokes is for you. In this not-so-original book, The Best Ever Book of Insurance Agent Jokes; Lots and Lots of Jokes Specially Repurposed for You-Know-Who, Mark Young takes a whole lot of tired, worn out jokes and makes them funny again. The Best Ever Book of Insurance Agent Jokes is so unoriginal, it's original. And, if you don't burst out laughing from at least one Insurance Agent joke in this book, there's something wrong with you. This book has so many Insurance Agent jokes, you won't know where to start. For example: Why do Insurance Agents wear slip-on shoes? You need an IQ of at least 4 to tie a shoelace. *** An evil genie captured an Insurance Agent and her two friends and banished them to the desert for a week. The genie allowed each person to bring one thing. The first friend brought a canteen so he wouldn't die of thirst. The second friend brought an umbrella to keep the sun off. The Insurance Agent brought a car door, because if it got too hot she could just roll down the window! *** Did you hear about the Insurance Agent who wore two jackets when she painted the house? The instructions on the can said: “Put on two coats.” *** Why do Insurance Agents laugh three times when they hear a joke? Once when it is told, once when it is explained to them, and once when they understand it.

The Sellout

The Sellout PDF

Author: Paul Beatty

Publisher: Farrar, Straus and Giroux

Published: 2015-03-03

Total Pages: 305

ISBN-13: 0374712247

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Winner of the Man Booker Prize Winner of the National Book Critics Circle Award in Fiction Winner of the John Dos Passos Prize for Literature New York Times Bestseller Los Angeles Times Bestseller Named One of the 10 Best Books of the Year by The New York Times Book Review Named a Best Book of the Year by Newsweek, The Denver Post, BuzzFeed, Kirkus Reviews, and Publishers Weekly Named a "Must-Read" by Flavorwire and New York Magazine's "Vulture" Blog A biting satire about a young man's isolated upbringing and the race trial that sends him to the Supreme Court, Paul Beatty's The Sellout showcases a comic genius at the top of his game. It challenges the sacred tenets of the United States Constitution, urban life, the civil rights movement, the father-son relationship, and the holy grail of racial equality—the black Chinese restaurant. Born in the "agrarian ghetto" of Dickens—on the southern outskirts of Los Angeles—the narrator of The Sellout resigns himself to the fate of lower-middle-class Californians: "I'd die in the same bedroom I'd grown up in, looking up at the cracks in the stucco ceiling that've been there since '68 quake." Raised by a single father, a controversial sociologist, he spent his childhood as the subject in racially charged psychological studies. He is led to believe that his father's pioneering work will result in a memoir that will solve his family's financial woes. But when his father is killed in a police shoot-out, he realizes there never was a memoir. All that's left is the bill for a drive-thru funeral. Fueled by this deceit and the general disrepair of his hometown, the narrator sets out to right another wrong: Dickens has literally been removed from the map to save California from further embarrassment. Enlisting the help of the town's most famous resident—the last surviving Little Rascal, Hominy Jenkins—he initiates the most outrageous action conceivable: reinstating slavery and segregating the local high school, which lands him in the Supreme Court.

Truth Be Told

Truth Be Told PDF

Author: Larry King

Publisher: Penguin Canada

Published: 2011-05-31

Total Pages: 268

ISBN-13: 0143180592

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When Larry King announced he would step down from his nightly live broadcast after more than 40,000 interviews, it signalled the end of an era in television history. At the same time, drama surrounding Larry's personal life was playing out in the headlines. Truth Be Told is a revealing and irresistibly entertaining look back on Larry's remarkable run at CNN, an honest look at Larry's own life, and a behind-the-scenes bird's-eye view of some of the marvellous people Larry has met and talked to throughout his career. This difficult period caused Larry to realize how much the world around him had changed over the course of his 50-year career. Looking at today's cultural and political luminaries as examples, Larry reflects on these changes and has a lot to say about everything and everyone: from marriage, politics, sports, and entertainment to the justice system, broadcasting, and the American future. This is a candid and surprising look inside the monumental career of one of the most powerful and legendary talk-show hosts as he signs off from the nightly television program that has been close to all of our hearts.