Live Right and Find Happiness (Although Beer is Much Faster)

Live Right and Find Happiness (Although Beer is Much Faster) PDF

Author: Dave Barry

Publisher: Penguin

Published: 2016-09-06

Total Pages: 242

ISBN-13: 0425280144

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Now in paperback from the Pulitzer Prize winner, the hilarious New York Times–bestselling exploration of what generations can teach one another—or not. During the course of his life, Dave Barry has learned much of wisdom, and he is eager to pass it on. Among other brilliant, brand-new pieces, Dave shares home truths with his new grandson and his daughter Sophie; explores the hometown of his youth, where all the parents seemed to be having un-Mad Men–like fun; and dives into firsthand accounts of the soccer craziness of Brazil and the just plain crazy craziness of Vladimir Putin’s Russia.

Dave Barry's Complete Guide to Guys

Dave Barry's Complete Guide to Guys PDF

Author: Dave Barry

Publisher: Ballantine Books

Published: 2010-07-28

Total Pages: 270

ISBN-13: 0307758745

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"Dave Barry is one funny human." --San Francisco Examiner For thousands of years, women have asked themselves: What is the deal with guys, anyway? What are they thinking? The answer, of course, is: virtually nothing. Deep down inside, guys are extremely shallow. But that has not stopped Dave Barry from writing an entire book about them. If you're a guy--or if you're attempting to share a remote control with one--you need this book, because it deals frankly and semi-thoroughly with such important guy issues as: Scratching The role of guys in world history, including the heretofore-unknown relationship between the discovery of North America and golf Why the average guy can remember who won the 1960 World Series, but not necessarily the names of all his children The Noogie Gene Why guys cannot simultaneously think and look at breasts Secret guy orgasm-delaying techniques, including the Margaret Thatcher Method Why guys prefer to believe that there is no such thing as a prostate And much, much more "Whether you're a guy--or attempting to share a bathroom with one--Barry has some wacky words of wisdom for you." --USA Today

I'll Mature When I'm Dead

I'll Mature When I'm Dead PDF

Author: Dave Barry

Publisher: Penguin

Published: 2010-05-04

Total Pages: 288

ISBN-13: 1101187271

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I'll Mature When I'm Dead is the New York Times bestseller from "the funniest man in America" (New York Times). Let Pulitzer Prize-winning humorist and nationally unrecognized voice of maturity Dave Barry make the journey to adulthood a little easier—and a lot funnier. Not everyone has to be dragged kicking and screaming through adulthood. Dave Barry will help through this process—with his hilarious takes on parenting, changing self-image, the battle of the sexes, technology, health care, celebrityhood, and even vampires!

The Greatest Invention In the History of Mankind Is Beer and Other Manly Insights

The Greatest Invention In the History of Mankind Is Beer and Other Manly Insights PDF

Author: Dave Barry

Publisher: Andrews McMeel Publishing

Published: 2001-03-15

Total Pages: 120

ISBN-13: 9780740715259

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In The Greatest Invention in the History of Mankind Is Beer and Other Manly Insights from Dave Barry Dave goes on a testosterone riff, enlightening all about the intricacies of being male. At higher levels, testosterone causes destructive male behavior, the two most terrible kinds being: 1. War. 2. Do-it-yourself projects.

Dave Barry's Bad Habits

Dave Barry's Bad Habits PDF

Author: Dave Barry

Publisher: Holt Paperbacks

Published: 1993-09-15

Total Pages: 308

ISBN-13: 9780805029642

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If you're not already acquainted--nay, infatuated--with the works of the man who the New York Times calls "the funniest man in America," you can get cracking right now with this all-time favorite collection of Dave Barry's humor columns. Dave Barry's Bad Habits won't rot your teeth, cause your insurance premiums to go up, or make your kids go cross-eyed if they sit too close to it. It will, however, make you laugh so hard your middle actually moves (the best exercise, and possibly the only kind you'll be interested in after forty). Here, preserved for all time, are Barry's profoundest musings on such topics as how to get kids to stop smoking (eliminate tenth grade), what to do if your car is making loud noises (turn up the radio), and a solution to the battle of the sexes (let the men do housework, say, for the next six thousand years to even things up). Together they serve to expose the little insanities of everyday life and assure us that we're not completely alone in a world gone mad.

I'll Mature When I'm Dead

I'll Mature When I'm Dead PDF

Author: Dave Barry

Publisher: Penguin

Published: 2011-04-05

Total Pages: 290

ISBN-13: 0425238989

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I'll Mature When I'm Dead is the New York Times bestseller from "the funniest man in America" (New York Times). Let Pulitzer Prize-winning humorist and nationally unrecognized voice of maturity Dave Barry make the journey to adulthood a little easier—and a lot funnier. Not everyone has to be dragged kicking and screaming through adulthood. Dave Barry will help through this process—with his hilarious takes on parenting, changing self-image, the battle of the sexes, technology, health care, celebrityhood, and even vampires!

Bad Habits

Bad Habits PDF

Author: Dave Barry

Publisher: Doubleday Books

Published: 1985-01-01

Total Pages: 227

ISBN-13: 9780385189545

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A columnist syndicated in more than fifty newspapers, Barry displays his unique knack for nuttiness in essays offering advice in a variety of areas, including how to get kids to stop smoking--"eliminate tenth grade"

Dave Barry Is Not Taking This Sitting Down

Dave Barry Is Not Taking This Sitting Down PDF

Author: Dave Barry

Publisher: Ballantine Books

Published: 2011-01-26

Total Pages: 258

ISBN-13: 0307778037

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Pulitzer Prize-winning humorist Dave Barry is a pretty amiable guy. But lately, he’s been getting a little worked up. What could make a mild-mannered man of words so hot under the collar? Well, a lot of things–like bad public art, Internet millionaires, SUVs, Regis Philbin . . . and even bigger problems, like • The slower-than-deceased-livestock left-lane drivers who apparently believe that the right lane is sacred and must never come in direct contact with tires • The parent-misery quotient of last-minute school science fair projects • Day trading and other careers that never require you to take off your bathrobe • The plague of the low-flow toilets, which is so bad that even in Miami, where you can buy drugs just by opening your front door and yelling “Hey! I want some crack,” you can’t even sell your first born to get a normal-flushing toilet Dave Barry is not taking any of this sitting down. He’s going to stand up for the rights of all Americans against ridiculously named specialty “–chino” coffees and the IRS. Just as soon as he gets the darn toilet flushed.

You Can Date Boys When You're Forty

You Can Date Boys When You're Forty PDF

Author: Dave Barry

Publisher: Penguin

Published: 2014-03-04

Total Pages: 240

ISBN-13: 110163149X

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A brilliantly funny exploration of the twin mysteries of parenthood and families from the Pulitzer Prize winner and New York Times–bestselling author of Insane City. In his New York Times–bestselling I’ll Mature When I’m Dead, Dave Barry embarked on the treacherous seas of adulthood, to hilarious results. What comes next? Parenthood, of course, and families. In uproarious, brand-new pieces, Barry tackles everything from family trips, bat mitzvah parties and dating (he’s serious about that title: “When my daughter can legally commence dating—February 24, 2040—I intend to monitor her closely, even if I am deceased”) to funeral instructions (“I would like my eulogy to be given by William Shatner”), the differences between male and female friendships, the deeper meaning of Fifty Shades of Grey, and a father’s ultimate sacrifice: accompanying his daughter to a Justin Bieber concert (“It turns out that the noise teenaged girls make to express happiness is the same noise they would make if their feet were being gnawed off by badgers”). Let’s face it: families not only enrich our lives every day, they drive us completely around the bend. Thank goodness we have Dave Barry as our guide!