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Hermitage, Wat and Some Nuns

Author: Howard of Warwick

Publisher:

Published: 2016

Total Pages: 324

ISBN-13: 9781913383046

"Medieval Shrewsbury is surely no place for murder. Not in this charming town would investigative monks wander around bothering people over every little incident. When Brother Hermitage arrives at Shrewsbury in the summer of 1068 something is up. Or rather down. Gilder, the great merchant is dead and Hermitage's urge to investigate is overwhelming. His companions, Cwen and Wat, weaver of pornographic tapestry, think this is a very bad idea. So does the whole town Moot. And the sheriff and the rest of the population. And then there are the nuns. Hermitage has never been strong in the face of adversity and an adverse nun is more than he can cope with. A whole order of them is something to be strenuously avoided. But there is always his duty. It's got him into trouble so many times; why should Shrewsbury be any different?"--Provided by publisher.

Hermitage, Wat and Some Nuns

Author: Howard of Warwick

Publisher: The Funny Book Company

Published: 2016-06-28

Total Pages: 294

ISBN-13: 0992939380

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From the world’s best-selling author of comedy historical mysteries comes another largely pointless excursion. Medieval Shrewsbury is surely no place for murder. Not in this charming town would investigative monks wander around bothering people over every little incident. When Brother Hermitage arrives at Shrewsbury in the summer of 1068 something is up. Or rather down. Gilder, the great merchant is dead and Hermitage’s urge to investigate is overwhelming. His companions, Cwen and Wat, weaver of pornographic tapestry think this is a very bad idea. So does the whole town Moot. And the sheriff and the rest of the population. And then there are the nuns. Hermitage has never been strong in the face of adversity and an adverse nun is more than he can cope with. A whole order of them is something to be strenuously avoided. But there is always his duty. It’s got him into trouble so many times; why should Shrewsbury be any different? “Like Cadfael meets Clousseau.” “Terry Pratchett does 1066.” “Rampant silliness.”

Hermitage, Wat and Some Druids

Author: Howard of Warwick

Publisher: The Funny Book Company

Published: 2015-12-20

Total Pages: 281

ISBN-13: 0992939372

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Brother Hermitage is at it again - this time with druids. Is it a murder mystery? Is it a thriller? Is it just something gone horribly wrong? When his nemesis, the Norman conqueror Le Pedvin orders him to Wales, Brother Hermitage knows it is going to go wrong. He's had a prophecy it's going to go wrong. And from his first steps on the road it strides firmly in that direction. Brother Hermitage, Wat, weaver of pornographic tapestry and Cwen, weaver in her own right and the fiercest of the lot, are commanded to find one dead Norman in the whole of Wales - as usual under pain of death. Add to that some treasure and a druid curse or two, and we have the recipe for a laugh out loud historical tale like no other. (Apart from the other Chronicles of Brother Hermitage) It's all complicated enough, but when what seems like the whole of the country wants to join in, things get very messy. And then there are the druids, and stone circles, and sacrifices.... "he who has laughter on his side has no need of proof" Theodore Adorno

The Tapestry of Death

Author: Howard of Warwick

Publisher: The Funny Book Company

Published: 2012-11-01

Total Pages: 356

ISBN-13: 1913383296

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The Tapestry of Death. More medieval mystery for people who laugh. England 1067: Briston the weaver has been murdered – in a very special way – and it is up to his old friend Wat to avenge his death. Brother Hermitage will naturally support his companion in the quest, but the young monk worries as the number of suspects keeps rising. He's never been good with crowds. When events take a turn for the truly bizarre, Hermitage and Wat find themselves up to their Saxon socks in people who want them dead, people who want one another dead and people who seem to want everyone dead. They must find a missing maiden, placate a giant killer and reveal the awful secret of the Tapestry of Death before matters are resolved. Resolved largely unsatisfactorily, but then that's life. With a monk, tradesmen, priests, Normans and Saxons, The Tapestry of Death should be a solid, traditional medieval who-done-it, but it isn't. Really, it isn't. Authentic and accurate representation of the time? Barely. Historically informative? Certainly not. Hilarious and very silly? Now you're getting warm. Critical analysis of the work of Howard of Warwick: “His writing is crisp, riotously funny, and he weaves a masterful little mystery that will leave you crying for more!” “Like Brother Cadfael visits Discworld.” “I would recommend this to anyone who loves a good story! It is so hard to wait until the new books come out!” Compared to Monty Python, Carry On films, Terry Pratchett ...and Winnie the Pooh! If you're looking for a serious historical mystery with all the usual trappings, look elsewhere. If you're hoping for characters who are knowledgable beyond their time and talk like a history book, prepare to be disappointed. If you're after a tale of a monk hopelessly out of his depth and a weaver who is really rather naughty, this is the book for you.

The Bayeux Embroidery

Author: Howard of Warwick

Publisher: The Funny Book Company

Published: 2019-02-24

Total Pages: 261

ISBN-13: 1999895983

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The Bayeux Tapestry is no laughing matter. Well, apart from the rude bits, obviously. The nuns of Kent have been commissioned by Earl Odo to create a great tapestry telling the glorious history of the Norman conquest of Britain. But when they start dying, one man must be sent for; Brother Hermitage, the King’s Investigator. Who would commit such a heinous crime? Odo himself? Another nun, perhaps? Some Saxons? The Archbishop of Canterbury? The people of the marshes? Well, it could be anyone really, and that’s generally a problem for Brother Hermitage. With Wat and Cwen, erstwhile weavers of “adult” tapestry themselves, he must solve the crime or face the consequences; as usual. The best plan is probably to wander around Kent rather hopelessly, and trust that something occurs to him right at the end; also as usual. At least in this tale the truth of the Bayeux Tapestry will be revealed: (well, a truth, perhaps) How did it come to be? Who made it? And who thinks that they should have been given the job instead? It’s the lucky 13th Chronicle of Brother Hermitage The man who barely survives his own investigations. The sleuth who seldom asks anyone the right questions. The monk who is firmly medieval and slightly detective. People have said things: ‘Hilarious’ ‘Laugh out loud’ ‘Like Pratchett does 1066’

The Garderobe of Death

Author: Howard of Warwick

Publisher: The Funny Book Company

Published: 2012-01-10

Total Pages: 360

ISBN-13: 191338330X

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Medieval mystery the Howard of Warwick way; funny! Now also a book. Available where all good books gather together. England 1067: Henri de Turold, King William's favourite hunting companion has been murdered. How anyone actually did it, given the remarkably personal nature of the fatal wound, is a bit of a mystery. Lord Robert Grosmal, of disordered mind, disordered castle and Henri's host at the time, knows that King William gets very tetchy when his friends are murdered. He sends to the nearby monastery of De'Ath's Dingle for a monk to investigate. Medieval monks are usually good at this sort of thing. Brother Hermitage is a medieval monk but he's not very good at this sort of thing. Motivated by the point of a sword he and his companion Wat the weaver set off to solve the crime. Oh, by the way King William is arriving that night so they better get a move on. Brother Hermitage's second criminal investigation reveals many things. Improvement is not among them. If you are looking for a poignant evocation of the medieval world, an insightful exploration of the characters of the time, buy a different book. Ellis Peters is quite good. After this debacle he even has another go in The Tapestry of Death. Out now on Kindle What has been said of "The Heretics of Death" 'I laughed 'till I cried,' 5* 'medieval hysterical mystery – must read!' 5* 'buy this book. It is cheap and it will make you laugh ' 5* 'I don't think I'm the target audience,' 1* 'Hermitage you're an idiot' Prior Athan of De'ath's Dingle.

Brother Hermitage's Christmas Gift

Author: Howard of Warwick

Publisher: The Funny Book Company

Published: 2017-11-30

Total Pages: 120

ISBN-13: 1999895908

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In a modest little tale for the season, Brother Hermitage heads for London. William Duke of Normandy is to be crowned King of England on Christmas day 1066 and he expects presents. For reasons beyond reason, the monastery of De'Ath's Dingle is invited to the ceremony and the only ones who can be let out on their own are Brother Hermitage and Wat the Weaver. But it will be a rush to get there. With only 7 days to travel over 100 miles, the pair must cross a frozen and largely lawless country if they are to make it to Westminster alive. And then there's the problem of Wat's attitude towards gifts in principle. He doesn't mind a reasonable exchange but simply giving sounds like a very poor deal. Perhaps the days of the journey will give Brother Hermitage the opportunity to breathe the spirit of the season into his weaving friend. Or perhaps not. Recent reviews for Howard of Warwick continue a theme: 5* "Very funny" 5* "Another demented tale" 5* "Briiiiiliant as always."

The Heretics of De'Ath

Author: Howard of Warwick

Publisher: The Funny Book Company

Published: 2010-12-12

Total Pages: 253

ISBN-13: 1913383288

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Medieval mystery for people who laugh starts here.... England's most famous date 1066: At the monastery of De'Ath's Dingle, during a completely pointless theological debate, there is a mysterious death. Routine business for the average investigative medieval monk. Unfortunately, this isn’t a tale of average monks. Anyone who would put the idiot Brother Simon in charge of a murder investigation is either one chant short of a plainsong or is up to something. When Brother Hermitage, innocent in every way, including bystanding, is lined up for execution, he begins to wonder if something might be going on. Perhaps his new companion Wat, weaver of pornographic tapestry, can figure out what it is. Before it's too late. If you are a lover of the historical detective genre, if you have a deep respect for the worlds created, don’t read this book. It’ll only upset you. Now available in a massive box set with The Garderobe of Death and The Tapestry of Death; for those with a lever-arch Kindle. People have commented on the whole sorry business: 5* Such a good writer, it's a whole new slant on medieval mystery. The truth is out there, sort of! Always makes me laugh, love these books, love this author. More please as soon as possible, just keep writing... 5* Like Cadfael meets Clouseau. 5* The usual mayhem, confusion, murder and laughs! 5* Always makes me laugh, love these books, love this author. 1* Stupid! Be warned, there are now 31 Chronicles of Brother Hermitage

A Murder for Master Wat

Author: Howard of Warwick

Publisher: The Funny Book Company

Published: 2018-03-25

Total Pages: 259

ISBN-13: 1999895924

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COMEDY; MEDIEVAL,CRIME. File under Howard of Warwick. (He invented the genre and must be held accountable). When weavers in the 11th century went out to play there was usually trouble. In this case, it's death, which Brother Hermitage, the King's Investigator, always finds very troublesome indeed. Wat the Weaver doesn't want to go to the weavers' Grand Moot in the first place and no one can make him. Except Mistress Cwen, of course. When they get there it all starts so well, but it only takes the blink of a bat's ear for murder to rear its ugly head and stare straight at Hermitage. He's starting to think that being King's Investigator is actually a cause of death in its own right. But this time, the perpetrators seem quite proud of their actions and have a lot more planned. Is this a race to stop a murder, rather than deal with all the mess afterwards? Hermitage certainly hopes so, although, as usual, he'd rather the whole thing just went away. A Grand Moot of weavers should be a time of joy, celebration and camaraderie, not greed, violence and a generous serving of just plain stupidity. Howard of Warwick invented Medieval Crime Comedy and doesn't know any better; 5* Hilarious 5* Laugh out Loud 5* Very silly 1* Silly (apparently "very" is worth 4*)

How Many Monks?

Author: Howard of Warwick

Publisher: The Funny Book Company

Published: 2023-08-23

Total Pages: 235

ISBN-13: 1913383601

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From Howard of Warwick, top 20 author with 18 No 1 Best Sellers, comes yet more murderous medieval nonsense. 5* Hilarious 5* Like Cadfael meets Clouseau 5* Another hysterical masterpiece. Very good indeed, brilliant. BBC Not content with being King William's investigator of murder, and he is not content with that at all, Brother Hermitage is now having his trouble delivered. The floods of Derby wash up something very specific and there is only one monk for the job. But who would do that to an abbot? And where did he come from? Not only will Hermitage have to discover a killer, he'll also have to find a monastery where there is none. Perhaps some detestable monks will be able to throw light on the situation. Could the Norman obsession with record-keeping turn out to be useful? At least this murder is only a short walk away, and Hermitage, Wat and Cwen traipse through a soggy countryside to discover more about monks and monasteries than the weavers ever wanted to know. The 30th - yes 30th Chronicle of Brother Hermitage continues the theme of a medieval detective monk who really shouldn’t be