Hermitage, Wat and Some Murder Or Other

Hermitage, Wat and Some Murder Or Other PDF

Author: HOWARD. OF WARWICK

Publisher:

Published: 2019

Total Pages:

ISBN-13: 9781999895914

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Humour ahead: The works of Howard of Warwick are hilarious and very silly. If you value your historical proprieties look away now. After 1066 not all the Normans were in England. Those left in Normandy were up to no good and the ghastly Le Pedvin, wants one of them dealt with. Brother Hermitage, the most medieval of detectives, and his companion Wat, weaver of tapestry you wouldn¿t want your children to see, are dispatched to the Norman home-land to bring a killer to justice. How they do it is up to them and why they¿re doing it is none of their business; they have their orders and the consequences of disobedience will be death ¿ as usual.

Hermitage, Wat and Some Murder or Other

Hermitage, Wat and Some Murder or Other PDF

Author: Howard of Warwick

Publisher: The Funny Book Company

Published: 2014-05-30

Total Pages: 349

ISBN-13: 1913383318

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Humour ahead: The works of Howard of Warwick are hilarious and very silly. If you value your historical proprieties look away now. After 1066 not all the Normans were in England. Those left in Normandy were up to no good and the ghastly Le Pedvin wants one of them dealt with. Brother Hermitage, the most medieval of detectives, and his companion Wat, weaver of tapestry you wouldn’t want your children to see, are dispatched to the Norman home-land to bring a killer to justice. How they do it is up to them and why they’re doing it is none of their business; they have their orders and the consequences of disobedience will be death – as usual. It’s not clear what Le Pedvin is up to. It’s not clear that anyone is actually dead. Not much is clear about Norman villagers at all. It’s definitely not clear how Hermitage and Wat are going to get out of this alive. But it will be…. Also by Howard of Warwick The Heretics of De’Ath: Hermitage and Wat’s first outing, setting the bar pretty low. The Garderobe of Death: Murder most foul. Really, really foul. The Tapestry of Death: Deceit, denial and the defective detective. The Domesday Book (No, Not That One): 1066 as it might have happened, but probably didn’t. The works of Howard of Warwick are now major books, with paper and everything. What people have said about Howard of Warwick 5* "The funniest book you will read for the next 1,000 years." 5* "Hilarious." 5* "A hit, a palpable hit." 1* "Started ridiculous and went downhill from there." 1* Compared to Terry Pratchett, Douglas Adams, Monty Python and Carry-on - you get the picture.

The Garderobe of Death

The Garderobe of Death PDF

Author: Howard of Warwick

Publisher: The Funny Book Company

Published: 2012-01-10

Total Pages: 360

ISBN-13: 191338330X

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Medieval mystery the Howard of Warwick way; funny! Now also a book. Available where all good books gather together. England 1067: Henri de Turold, King William's favourite hunting companion has been murdered. How anyone actually did it, given the remarkably personal nature of the fatal wound, is a bit of a mystery. Lord Robert Grosmal, of disordered mind, disordered castle and Henri's host at the time, knows that King William gets very tetchy when his friends are murdered. He sends to the nearby monastery of De'Ath's Dingle for a monk to investigate. Medieval monks are usually good at this sort of thing. Brother Hermitage is a medieval monk but he's not very good at this sort of thing. Motivated by the point of a sword he and his companion Wat the weaver set off to solve the crime. Oh, by the way King William is arriving that night so they better get a move on. Brother Hermitage's second criminal investigation reveals many things. Improvement is not among them. If you are looking for a poignant evocation of the medieval world, an insightful exploration of the characters of the time, buy a different book. Ellis Peters is quite good. After this debacle he even has another go in The Tapestry of Death. Out now on Kindle What has been said of "The Heretics of Death" 'I laughed 'till I cried,' 5* 'medieval hysterical mystery – must read!' 5* 'buy this book. It is cheap and it will make you laugh ' 5* 'I don't think I'm the target audience,' 1* 'Hermitage you're an idiot' Prior Athan of De'ath's Dingle.

The Heretics of De'Ath

The Heretics of De'Ath PDF

Author: Howard of Warwick

Publisher: The Funny Book Company

Published: 2010-12-12

Total Pages: 253

ISBN-13: 1913383288

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Medieval mystery for people who laugh starts here.... England's most famous date 1066: At the monastery of De'Ath's Dingle, during a completely pointless theological debate, there is a mysterious death. Routine business for the average investigative medieval monk. Unfortunately, this isn’t a tale of average monks. Anyone who would put the idiot Brother Simon in charge of a murder investigation is either one chant short of a plainsong or is up to something. When Brother Hermitage, innocent in every way, including bystanding, is lined up for execution, he begins to wonder if something might be going on. Perhaps his new companion Wat, weaver of pornographic tapestry, can figure out what it is. Before it's too late. If you are a lover of the historical detective genre, if you have a deep respect for the worlds created, don’t read this book. It’ll only upset you. Now available in a massive box set with The Garderobe of Death and The Tapestry of Death; for those with a lever-arch Kindle. People have commented on the whole sorry business: 5* Such a good writer, it's a whole new slant on medieval mystery. The truth is out there, sort of! Always makes me laugh, love these books, love this author. More please as soon as possible, just keep writing... 5* Like Cadfael meets Clouseau. 5* The usual mayhem, confusion, murder and laughs! 5* Always makes me laugh, love these books, love this author. 1* Stupid! Be warned, there are now 31 Chronicles of Brother Hermitage

Hermitage, Wat and Some Druids

Hermitage, Wat and Some Druids PDF

Author: Howard of Warwick

Publisher: The Funny Book Company

Published: 2015-12-20

Total Pages: 281

ISBN-13: 0992939372

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Brother Hermitage is at it again - this time with druids. Is it a murder mystery? Is it a thriller? Is it just something gone horribly wrong? When his nemesis, the Norman conqueror Le Pedvin orders him to Wales, Brother Hermitage knows it is going to go wrong. He's had a prophecy it's going to go wrong. And from his first steps on the road it strides firmly in that direction. Brother Hermitage, Wat, weaver of pornographic tapestry and Cwen, weaver in her own right and the fiercest of the lot, are commanded to find one dead Norman in the whole of Wales - as usual under pain of death. Add to that some treasure and a druid curse or two, and we have the recipe for a laugh out loud historical tale like no other. (Apart from the other Chronicles of Brother Hermitage) It's all complicated enough, but when what seems like the whole of the country wants to join in, things get very messy. And then there are the druids, and stone circles, and sacrifices.... "he who has laughter on his side has no need of proof" Theodore Adorno

The Tapestry of Death

The Tapestry of Death PDF

Author: Howard of Warwick

Publisher: The Funny Book Company

Published: 2012-11-01

Total Pages: 356

ISBN-13: 1913383296

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The Tapestry of Death. More medieval mystery for people who laugh. England 1067: Briston the weaver has been murdered – in a very special way – and it is up to his old friend Wat to avenge his death. Brother Hermitage will naturally support his companion in the quest, but the young monk worries as the number of suspects keeps rising. He's never been good with crowds. When events take a turn for the truly bizarre, Hermitage and Wat find themselves up to their Saxon socks in people who want them dead, people who want one another dead and people who seem to want everyone dead. They must find a missing maiden, placate a giant killer and reveal the awful secret of the Tapestry of Death before matters are resolved. Resolved largely unsatisfactorily, but then that's life. With a monk, tradesmen, priests, Normans and Saxons, The Tapestry of Death should be a solid, traditional medieval who-done-it, but it isn't. Really, it isn't. Authentic and accurate representation of the time? Barely. Historically informative? Certainly not. Hilarious and very silly? Now you're getting warm. Critical analysis of the work of Howard of Warwick: “His writing is crisp, riotously funny, and he weaves a masterful little mystery that will leave you crying for more!” “Like Brother Cadfael visits Discworld.” “I would recommend this to anyone who loves a good story! It is so hard to wait until the new books come out!” Compared to Monty Python, Carry On films, Terry Pratchett ...and Winnie the Pooh! If you're looking for a serious historical mystery with all the usual trappings, look elsewhere. If you're hoping for characters who are knowledgable beyond their time and talk like a history book, prepare to be disappointed. If you're after a tale of a monk hopelessly out of his depth and a weaver who is really rather naughty, this is the book for you.

Hermitage, Wat and Some Nuns

Hermitage, Wat and Some Nuns PDF

Author: Howard of Warwick

Publisher: The Funny Book Company

Published: 2016-06-28

Total Pages: 294

ISBN-13: 0992939380

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From the world’s best-selling author of comedy historical mysteries comes another largely pointless excursion. Medieval Shrewsbury is surely no place for murder. Not in this charming town would investigative monks wander around bothering people over every little incident. When Brother Hermitage arrives at Shrewsbury in the summer of 1068 something is up. Or rather down. Gilder, the great merchant is dead and Hermitage’s urge to investigate is overwhelming. His companions, Cwen and Wat, weaver of pornographic tapestry think this is a very bad idea. So does the whole town Moot. And the sheriff and the rest of the population. And then there are the nuns. Hermitage has never been strong in the face of adversity and an adverse nun is more than he can cope with. A whole order of them is something to be strenuously avoided. But there is always his duty. It’s got him into trouble so many times; why should Shrewsbury be any different? “Like Cadfael meets Clousseau.” “Terry Pratchett does 1066.” “Rampant silliness.”

A Murder for Master Wat

A Murder for Master Wat PDF

Author: Howard of Warwick

Publisher: The Funny Book Company

Published: 2018-03-25

Total Pages: 259

ISBN-13: 1999895924

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COMEDY; MEDIEVAL,CRIME. File under Howard of Warwick. (He invented the genre and must be held accountable). When weavers in the 11th century went out to play there was usually trouble. In this case, it's death, which Brother Hermitage, the King's Investigator, always finds very troublesome indeed. Wat the Weaver doesn't want to go to the weavers' Grand Moot in the first place and no one can make him. Except Mistress Cwen, of course. When they get there it all starts so well, but it only takes the blink of a bat's ear for murder to rear its ugly head and stare straight at Hermitage. He's starting to think that being King's Investigator is actually a cause of death in its own right. But this time, the perpetrators seem quite proud of their actions and have a lot more planned. Is this a race to stop a murder, rather than deal with all the mess afterwards? Hermitage certainly hopes so, although, as usual, he'd rather the whole thing just went away. A Grand Moot of weavers should be a time of joy, celebration and camaraderie, not greed, violence and a generous serving of just plain stupidity. Howard of Warwick invented Medieval Crime Comedy and doesn't know any better; 5* Hilarious 5* Laugh out Loud 5* Very silly 1* Silly (apparently "very" is worth 4*)

Not Another Murder

Not Another Murder PDF

Author: Howard of Warwick

Publisher: The Funny Book Company

Published: 2024-06-24

Total Pages: 243

ISBN-13: 1913383644

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Not Another Murder. A question? A statement? Or the despairing sigh of a monk convinced that Death's scythe must have caught in his habit? Escape from Gernesey and a return to Derby is on everyone's mind, but events have spotted Brother Hermitage, and they're up to their usual tricks. This time, they've put him in a priory. What could be better? And what could possibly go wrong? The cloistered life has called him back and so all will be well. There will be no murder here, even though he's the King's Investigator. No one will die, ignoring the deaths that seem to follow him around. And anyway, this is only temporary. There won't be time for anything untoward to happen. Brother Hermitage hasn't been reading his own chronicles, has he? While Wat and Cwen try to make the best of things and work out who to bribe to get out of this place, Hermitage doesn't even make it through the first night before the body turns up. How it was done is a complete mystery, never mind why. And there is certainly something odd about this priory and its monks, who don't seem at all concerned that one of them is now dead. But a route off the island quickly opens up before them, and so there might not be time to solve some murder. With any luck, they'll be miles away before long. All they need is some money; considerably more money than they currently have. That priory seemed to have a lot of treasure... Embark on Chronicle number thirty-two, and your mind will be filled with wonder. (Wondering why, mainly.)

A Murder of Convenience

A Murder of Convenience PDF

Author: Howard of Warwick

Publisher: The Funny Book Company

Published: 2021-06-24

Total Pages: 247

ISBN-13: 1913383180

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Medieval Crime Comedy continues unabated as Howard of Warwick refuses to be abated. From the Best-Selling author of this very peculiar genre comes yet more medieval murder with the usual dash of nonsense. This time, there’s murder in the air; and in the bushes, the castles, the highways and byways. And Brother Hermitage is caught in the middle of the lot; as usual. Even though he’s expecting a murder to be dropped in his lap at any moment, the arrival of this one and the manner of its delivery take him completely by surprise. As the tale unravels, a simple murder and an investigation to discover the culprit would be a bit of a relief. But the Normans seem to be at the bottom of this and their intentions are wholly dishonourable. When the church puts its nose in the mix, Wat the Weaver concludes that they are completely out of their depth. But there is a victim, or there might be, and action must be taken. A journey to Nottingham reunites them with some old friends, well, friends-ish, but they seem as confused as everyone else. At least Cwen finds an ally, which gives Wat plenty to worry about. When the weaver gets drunk and comes up with the most ridiculous suggestion for a murder investigation that any of them have ever heard, it’s clear that things have gone downhill very quickly. With very important people showing a great interest in this business, Hermitage has to be very careful with his, “aha”; if he can even come up with one that makes sense. Who did whatever it is that might have been done? Will everyone live happily ever after? Were they living happily to begin with? Read A Murder of Convenience and there’s a small chance you might find out. And then there’s the crime of Mrs Grod’s cooking. Reviews for previous volumes: 5* Brilliant tale of mayhem and murder 5* Genius, funny, endearing and a proper page turner 5* Howard of Warwick never fails to deliver a good laugh