Diary of a Crap Housewife

Diary of a Crap Housewife PDF

Author: Jessica Rowe

Publisher: Allen & Unwin

Published: 2019-04-01

Total Pages: 216

ISBN-13: 1760870951

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Why not cut the crap, take the pressure off and admit to the moments, days, weeks and months when the wheels of the household do fall off? 'Warning: this ain't no recipe book! But Jess's real, raw and often roaringly funny tales will nourish your soul. You'll devour it! And ask for seconds!' - Sarah Harris 'J-Ro's exuberance for this wonderful, sometimes messy and at times chaotic journey through life jumps joyfully out of each page. She's honest. She's disorganised. And she's got a heart of gold. Viva la Crap Housewife!' - Samantha Armytage Why not cut the crap, take the pressure off, and admit to the moments, days, weeks and months when the wheels fall off? In this fabulously funny, down-to-earth book, Diary of a Crap Housewife, Jessica Rowe writes honestly about her talent (or lack thereof) for cooking, about what's really important when it comes to mothering and family, and about her many and varied views, musings and commonsense advice on other crap housewife matters. As an added bonus, there are thirteen crap housewife recipes included, from Jessica's old favourite, spag bol, to a fresh and tasty Waldorf salad, and all so simple you can't go wrong. Being a crap housewife is a badge Jessica wears with pride, and it's a title she invites other women to embrace. The idea of crap lies in the real-life messes, hiccups, disasters and bad meals that many of us dish up and deal with every day. This mum is tired of the photos of perfectly packed school lunches, posts about gourmet family dinners eaten together at the table, and tales of neat, tidy and obedient children with smoothly brushed hair. It's time to reset the bar. Make expectations realistic. Strive to be kind, loving, smart and funny. Perfection is not required. 'Jess Rowe may be a crap housewife but she is a great writer and an even better friend. And she's right: I can be a bit of a smart arse.' - Joe Hildebrand 'This woman has enriched my life. And if you read this book your life will be enriched with honesty and love too!' - Denise Drysdale

Diary of a Bad Housewife

Diary of a Bad Housewife PDF

Author: Emma Beasley

Publisher: Createspace Independent Publishing Platform

Published: 2015-11-09

Total Pages: 186

ISBN-13: 9781517368418

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I have three kids, four cats, two dogs, one husband, and a migraine. My oldest son is an MD: Manic Depressive. My middle child won't be happy until she has lost enough weight to buy her clothes in the Barbie aisle. My youngest son sleeps all day and prowls around all night. I don't have his test results back yet, but I'm pretty sure he's a vampire. Life is like a box of chocolates for some. For me, it's more like the popular board game by Parker Bros: Monotony. No matter how meticulously I sweep, mop, and vacuum, I turn around and have to do it all again in six months. There was a time when an unfulfilled housewife could stick her head inside a gas oven and end it all while still retaining a modicum of dignity. If my husband comes home from work to find my head in the microwave, I'm just going to look silly. The afterlife is likely overrated anyway. Take the silk gowns for example. Ironically, most women wouldn't be caught dead wearing white after labor day. Besides, neatness has never been my strong suit. I will spill coffee or grape juice on it the first day. In other words, I'll be doing laundry again. And if that silk doesn't need to be dry cleaned, those wings surely will. I'm a realist. My husband imagines spending eternity lounging around on a fluffy cloud and doing absolutely nothing - a role for which he is supremely qualified. I, on the other hand, anticipate that the cloud's moisture will make my hair go limp. Heaven might not be an option because my husband is an atheist and I'm exhausted. People sometimes ask if that concerns me. What they don't realize is that when you're married, as long as you and your spouse are together for the rest of eternity, you're going to be in hell either way.

Diary of an Alcoholic Housewife

Diary of an Alcoholic Housewife PDF

Author: Brenda Wilhelmson

Publisher: Simon and Schuster

Published: 2011-03-01

Total Pages: 330

ISBN-13: 1616490004

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A gripping first-hand story of personal triumph and recovery by a wealthy American housewife who appeared to have it all but who was, in reality, losing life's most important moments in an alcohol-induced haze. Brenda Wilhelmson was like a lot of women in her neighborhood. She had a husband and two children. She was educated and made a good living as a writer. She had a vibrant social life with a tight circle of friends. She could party until dawn and take her children to school the next day. From the outside, she appeared to have it all together. But, in truth, alcohol was slowly taking over, turning her world on its side. Waking up to another hangover, growing tired of embarrassing herself in front of friends and family, and feeling important moments slip away, Brenda made the most critical decision of her life: to get sober. She kept a diary of her first year (and beyond) in recovery, chronicling the struggles of finding a meeting she could look forward to, relating to her fellow alcoholics, and finding a sponsor with whom she connected. Along the way, she discovered the challenges and pleasures of living each day without alcohol, navigating a social circle where booze is a centerpiece, and dealing with her alcoholic father's terminal illness and denial. Brenda Wilhelmson's Diary of an Alcoholic Housewife offers insight, wisdom, and relevance for readers in recovery, as well as their loved ones, no matter how long they've been sober.

Distracted Housewife in Dubai ... Diary

Distracted Housewife in Dubai ... Diary PDF

Author: Marianne Makdisi

Publisher: Austin Macauley Publishers

Published: 2022-11-30

Total Pages: 337

ISBN-13: 9948807812

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Meet Brittany Blum, a mother of three living far from home who is certain she’d nail life in the desert if she could: a. Lose the Dubai stone b. Set parental controls on her kids’ devices c. Stop valet parking d. Figure out what to do with herself now she’s followed her husband to larger-than-life Dubai and lost him to another woman At the start of the year, Brittany decides it’s time to get back on her feet. As she struggles through the ups and downs of her newly single life in the sandpit and tries to shrug off the ‘trailing spouse’ label she hated anyway, she turns for support to four very different friends: Adrianne, Natasha, her first ‘ex’ and a bottle of Prosecco. Welcome to Brittany’s first diary: a year of trail-blazing – with the occasional crash and burn – rediscovery.

The Andy Cohen Diaries

The Andy Cohen Diaries PDF

Author: Andy Cohen

Publisher: Macmillan

Published: 2014-11-11

Total Pages: 353

ISBN-13: 1627792287

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The New York Times bestselling look at the whirlwind life of the beloved pop icon Andy Cohen, in his own cheeky, candid, and irreverent words

The Desperate Diary of a Country Housewife

The Desperate Diary of a Country Housewife PDF

Author: Daisy Waugh

Publisher: HarperCollins UK

Published: 2008

Total Pages: 31

ISBN-13: 0007265239

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Ever thought about fleeing the urban jungle for rural bliss in the West Country? Fresh air, lush fields and a rambling house may be idyllic, but not when you've got to contend with collapsing ceilings, garden warfare with the neighbour, and being given a 'Bonnie Tyler' by the local hairdresser.

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