Dad Jokes

Dad Jokes PDF

Author: Jimmy Niro

Publisher: World's Best Dad Jokes Collection

Published: 2018

Total Pages: 0

ISBN-13: 9781492675372

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The perfect gift for dads and pun-lovers alike "Dad, can you put my shoes on?" "No, I don't think they'll fit me." Ah, the dad joke--humor that reminds us of all the lovable, embarrassing dads out there. Be prepared for the obvious, silly, and awkward in this massive collection of the best groan-worthy dad jokes around, including clever quips, overly literal dialogue, and punny one-liners. These jokes may be on porpoise, but they whale definitely make you laugh: I used to hate facial hair, but then it started growing on me. I'm reading a book about anti-gravity. It's impossible to put down Q: What's the hardest thing about learning to ride a bicycle? A: The road. With over 600 knee-slappers, head-shakers, and groan-makers, Dad Jokes is packed with enough witty quips and cheesy-but-grate jokes for you to hold your own against even the most embarrassing of dads. But remember--you don't have to be a dad to tell dad jokes

The Ultimate Dad Joke Book

The Ultimate Dad Joke Book PDF

Author: Hugh Murmie

Publisher:

Published: 2020-05-10

Total Pages: 108

ISBN-13:

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New for 2020! Easy Father's Day gift for your favorite guy! The Ultimate Dad Joke Book is jam packed with family friendly, clean and hysterical jokes that are great for everyone from your toddler to your great-grandma! Buckle up and get ready for some knee slapping, head shaking and gut busting laughter every time you flip a page. Over 500 hilarious jokes, puns and one-liners Squeaky clean, family safe jokes for kids (and adults) of all ages Great selection of time honored classics and all new jokes for 2020 Grab your copy today and channel your inner dad with some amazingly groan worthy humor bombs!

Dad Jokes

Dad Jokes PDF

Author: Editors of Portable Press

Publisher: Simon and Schuster

Published: 2017-09-01

Total Pages: 254

ISBN-13: 1684120071

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Dad’s comedy arsenal is about to get a huge upgrade . . . to the relief of everyone around him! Cue the groans. Put an end to courtesy laughs and awkward silences with the jokes in this book! From the people who brought you Uncle John’s Bathroom Reader, this is an eclectic collection of the punniest, funniest, most outrageous knee-slappers that have ever been told! At work, at home, at the game—Dad will beat them all to the punch—line, that is! He’ll be hip and humorous with totally bodacious jokes like these: Einstein developed a theory about space. And it was about time, too! Why is Christmas just like another day in the office? Because you do all the work and some fat guy in a suit gets all the credit! Dad: “I wouldn’t want to be buried in this graveyard.” Kid: “Why not?” Dad: “Because I'm not dead yet!” And many more!

The Ultimate Book of Dad Jokes

The Ultimate Book of Dad Jokes PDF

Author: Gordon Hideaki Nagai

Publisher: Simon and Schuster

Published: 2016-05-10

Total Pages: 118

ISBN-13: 1612435904

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A MASSIVE COLLECTION OF LAUGHABLE, CHEESY JOKES PERFECT FOR AMUSING DADS WHILE SLIGHTLY EMBARRASSING THE KIDS As groan-inducing as they are hilarious, dad jokes are the punny one-liners and oh-so-clever quips fathers never tire of telling. With this massive collection, no Dad will ever lack new material to make his kids facepalm: • A watermelon and a honeydew wanted to get married right away, but they cantaloupe. • After Humpty Dumpty recovered from his fall, he was just a shell of his former self. • Sign language interpreters have to lean sideways to translate something in italics. • Anyone with a wheat allergy that routinely eats pasta is just a gluten for punishment. • A chord walked into a bar and ordered a drink. The bartender said, “We don’t serve minors.”

The VERY Embarrassing Book of Dad Jokes

The VERY Embarrassing Book of Dad Jokes PDF

Author: Ian Allen

Publisher: Portico

Published: 2013-08-08

Total Pages: 178

ISBN-13: 1909396095

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Why did the banana go to the doctors? Because he wasn't peeling very well! Proving the age-old maxim that ‘it’s in the way that you tell them’, Dads – for the best part of forever – have always been renowned for being truly god-awful joke tellers. Whether it’s telling them at the wrong moment, misremembering the punchline or it just simply being one of those jokes that were terrible to begin with, Dads are an embarrassment to the whole family when it comes to trying to tell jokes. The VERY Embarrassing Book of Dad Jokes is full to the brim with jokes that only your dear old Dad would dare say – jokes that will make you groan, sigh ... and then probably make you groan again. Dads take great pleasure in these kinds of jokes and some of them are so rubbish they actually blossom into proper rib-ticklers – but don’t tell your dad that, it’ll only encourage him!

Dad Jokes for Kids

Dad Jokes for Kids PDF

Author: Jimmy Niro

Publisher: Sourcebooks, Inc.

Published: 2020-05-05

Total Pages: 84

ISBN-13: 1728205271

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Turn the bad jokes back on dad with this seriously silly joke book, the perfect funny Halloween gift for kids and families to laugh and celebrate together! Dads have been embarrassing their kids for decades with goofy and groan-worthy jokes, and now it's their children's turn! In this hilarious new joke book from USA Today bestselling author Jimmy Niro, kids can out-dad-joke their dads and even learn how to write some of their own. Filled with over 350 silly jokes about school, sports, animals, and more, Dad Jokes for Kids will have young readers rolling on the floor with laughter! Plus, children can learn to write their own dad jokes with fun activities in the back! This book is perfect for: The whole family - perfect for kids ages 7 to 12, but offers fun for the entire family! Reluctant readers - fun jokes help engage reluctant kids, helping them gain confidence and build reading comprehension and vocabulary Screen-free time - Endless laughs for road trips, vacations, sleepovers, game nights, and more! Gifts - makes a great holiday stocking stuffer, white elephant gag gift for kids, or Father's Day gift to share with dads Includes jokes like: Q: What did the carrot say to the broccoli? A: Nothing. Vegetables can't talk. You can't play hide-and-seek with mountains. They're always peaking.

The Official John Wayne Big Book of Dad Jokes

The Official John Wayne Big Book of Dad Jokes PDF

Author: Jeremy Brown

Publisher: Media Lab Books

Published: 2021-04-13

Total Pages: 176

ISBN-13: 9781948174732

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From giving as good as he got at the Harvard Lampoon to his comedic work in such films and TV shows as Donovan’s Reef, North to Alaska, Rowan & Martin’s Laugh-In, I Love Lucy, Dean Martin Celebrity Roast and The Red Skelton Hour, John Wayne was never shy about exhibiting his wry, knowing sense of humor. It’s this facet of Duke that The Official John Wayne Big Book of Dad Jokes captures. A father of six children himself, Duke was no stranger to making kids crack up (or at least trying to). This book presents those stories of Duke as practical joker as well as willing victim, embedded within more than 400 clever, yet dreadful jokes, stories, riddles and puns, perfect for family members of every age. Some of the jokes are Duke- and Western-themed, but most are simply good, original Dad jokes: some good, some bad, some awful, but all funny. Readers will also find inside nearly three dozen fun photos of Duke exhibiting his good humor for all to see, laughing with his kids or fellow actors on set and behind the scenes, making this book a treasure for fans and fathers alike.

Dad Jokes for New Dads

Dad Jokes for New Dads PDF

Author: Jimmy Niro

Publisher: Sourcebooks, Inc.

Published: 2020-05-01

Total Pages: 113

ISBN-13: 1728205301

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The perfect Christmas gift for new dads and expecting fathers! A punderful resource of the funniest dad jokes that every dad needs in their arsenal! With over 500 brand new jokes on a range of topics to get dads ready to embarrass their children—and most importantly—embarrass them early, this laugh-out-loud book is a hilarious gift great for baby showers, holiday stocking stuffers, Father's Day, and beyond! From USA Today bestselling author Jimmy Niro, Dad Jokes for New Dads is a special edition joke book for new parents and soon-to-be fathers that celebrates dads with a full arsenal of dad jokes, silly quips, witty one-liners, and "helpful" pro tips to help them get by! A funny white elephant gag gift from any kid, wife, or partner to celebrate and prepare the new dad in their life! Includes knee-slappers like: Q: What did the big beer name its baby? A: Micro brew. I wrote a book about birds once. My publisher said it flew off the shelves! Dad Pro Tip #1: If the baby starts to spit up, turn it toward someone else.

The Big Book of Dad Jokes

The Big Book of Dad Jokes PDF

Author: Joe Kerz

Publisher: Simon and Schuster

Published: 2022-04-19

Total Pages: 389

ISBN-13: 1631586653

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Hundreds and Hundreds of Jokes that Will Drive Your Family Crazy Nothing is more hilarious for moms, sons, and daughters than the bad jokes dads tell. (Well, at least he thinks they're hilarious . . .) Have you ever noticed when you’re out to dinner and your dad takes it upon himself to antagonize your server with a lame joke? Has he ever made a pun that made everyone at a family gathering roll their eyes? Has he ever made a corny comment about things simply lying around the house? If you answered “yes” to any of the following, you’re not alone. Dad jokes are at the center of all dad interactions and the core of every dad’s persona. This comedic compendium compiles more than eight hundred of the best jokes dads can use to hone their craft and ensure maximum eye rolling. Included within are jokes such as: Did you hear about the restaurant on the moon? Great food; no atmosphere. Did you hear about the kidnapping at school? It’s fine, he woke up. What did the judge say when the skunk walked in the court room? Odor in the court. What do you call an elephant that doesn’t matter? An irrelephant. What kind of tea is hard to swallow? Reality. With Dad Jokes, give your dad the gift of becoming the least funny/most "punny" guy in the room.