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Brother Hermitage's Christmas Gift

Author: Howard of Warwick

Publisher: The Funny Book Company

Published: 2017-11-30

Total Pages: 120

ISBN-13: 1999895908

In a modest little tale for the season, Brother Hermitage heads for London. William Duke of Normandy is to be crowned King of England on Christmas day 1066 and he expects presents. For reasons beyond reason, the monastery of De'Ath's Dingle is invited to the ceremony and the only ones who can be let out on their own are Brother Hermitage and Wat the Weaver. But it will be a rush to get there. With only 7 days to travel over 100 miles, the pair must cross a frozen and largely lawless country if they are to make it to Westminster alive. And then there's the problem of Wat's attitude towards gifts in principle. He doesn't mind a reasonable exchange but simply giving sounds like a very poor deal. Perhaps the days of the journey will give Brother Hermitage the opportunity to breathe the spirit of the season into his weaving friend. Or perhaps not. Recent reviews for Howard of Warwick continue a theme: 5* "Very funny" 5* "Another demented tale" 5* "Briiiiiliant as always."

Brother Hermitage's Christmas Gift

Author: Howard of Warwick

Publisher:

Published:

Total Pages:

ISBN-13: 9781999895976

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In a modest little tale for the season, Brother Hermitage heads for London. William Duke of Normandy is to be crowned King of England on Christmas day 1066; and he expects presents. For reasons beyond reason the monastery of De'Ath's Dingle is invited to the ceremony and the only ones who can be let out on their own are Brother Hermitage and Wat the Weaver. But it will be a rush to get there. With only 7 days to travel over 100 miles, the pair must cross a frozen and largely lawless country if they are to make it to Westminster alive. And then there's the problem of Wat's attitude towards gifts in principle. He doesn't mind a reasonable exchange but simply giving sounds like a very poor deal. Perhaps the days of the journey will give Brother Hermitage the opportunity to breath the spirit of the season into his weaving friend. Or perhaps not.

Not Another Murder

Author: Howard of Warwick

Publisher: The Funny Book Company

Published: 2024-06-24

Total Pages: 243

ISBN-13: 1913383644

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Not Another Murder. A question? A statement? Or the despairing sigh of a monk convinced that Death's scythe must have caught in his habit? Escape from Gernesey and a return to Derby is on everyone's mind, but events have spotted Brother Hermitage, and they're up to their usual tricks. This time, they've put him in a priory. What could be better? And what could possibly go wrong? The cloistered life has called him back and so all will be well. There will be no murder here, even though he's the King's Investigator. No one will die, ignoring the deaths that seem to follow him around. And anyway, this is only temporary. There won't be time for anything untoward to happen. Brother Hermitage hasn't been reading his own chronicles, has he? While Wat and Cwen try to make the best of things and work out who to bribe to get out of this place, Hermitage doesn't even make it through the first night before the body turns up. How it was done is a complete mystery, never mind why. And there is certainly something odd about this priory and its monks, who don't seem at all concerned that one of them is now dead. But a route off the island quickly opens up before them, and so there might not be time to solve some murder. With any luck, they'll be miles away before long. All they need is some money; considerably more money than they currently have. That priory seemed to have a lot of treasure... Embark on Chronicle number thirty-two, and your mind will be filled with wonder. (Wondering why, mainly.)

No Murder Here

Author: Howard of Warwick

Publisher: The Funny Book Company

Published: 2024-02-29

Total Pages: 278

ISBN-13: 1913383628

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5* Absolutely brilliant, as always. 5* So well written, so entertaining and amusing. 5* A great read from start to finish There is no murder here. And even if there was, under no circumstances is Brother Hermitage, King William’s investigator, to be allowed anywhere near it. This is a very sensitive matter for the Duke of Normandy, now King of England, and he wants it dealt with properly. He doesn’t want a band of Saxon idiots trampling all over the place, offending everyone. But, in a far-off outpost of the duchy, an ancient ritual has been enacted, which immediately went horribly wrong. Someone must be sent to find out what happened and who is behind it. Negotiating the way through scheming and feuding locals will demand sensitivity. Untangling superstition from fact will require careful analysis. Appreciating custom and practice will need a sympathetic ear. And you’ll need to speak the right language, obviously. So, this is really not a job for Brother Hermitage. It’s probably even more inappropriate for the weavers, Wat and Cwen - the woman who stares at people and the man who made those disgusting pictures. Keep them away. However, the more explicit the instruction, the greater the chance of mistake… In any case, there is no murder here. Oh, really?

Murder Can Be Murder

Author: Howard of Warwick

Publisher: The Funny Book Company

Published: 2023-03-24

Total Pages: 258

ISBN-13: 1913383539

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It's only murder, why is it so difficult? When Brother Hermitage is approached on the streets of Derby, he knows that it is going to be bad news. As King William's duly appointed investigator, everything is bad news. But young Fridolf, an apprentice goldsmith from London has the most bizarre request concerning a murder that Hermitage has ever heard. Still, at least he has the opportunity to make things very clear and put the young man straight before sending him on his way. Until Wat and Cwen explain that Hermitage hasn't made anything clear at all and that if calamity is to be avoided, some action is needed. Luckily, for a weaver's workshop, Wat's home has a surfeit of investigators and so a despatch to London will not be a problem. And a trip to London, just to make sure everything is all right, will be a positive pleasure. Until those despatched get themselves in trouble, of course. Most unreasonably of all, those wretched Normans have decided that the old Saxon punishment for murder, a hefty fine, is no longer sufficient. They have something much more permanent in mind. Containing many facts, including the Saxon defeat of the Norman army in 1066, and a real-life sheriff of London, Murder Can Be Murder goes where other medieval mysteries wouldn’t bother. Howard of Warwick, now a UK top 20 Amazon best-seller, brings more real life to the medieval murder mystery. Along with real confusion, greed and all-around incompetence. Previous chronicles, of which there are many, have been commented upon. 5* Fantastic series 5* Hilarious 5* You know you’re in for a good giggle 1* Reads like an episode of Blackadder

How Many Monks?

Author: Howard of Warwick

Publisher: The Funny Book Company

Published: 2023-08-23

Total Pages: 235

ISBN-13: 1913383601

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From Howard of Warwick, top 20 author with 18 No 1 Best Sellers, comes yet more murderous medieval nonsense. 5* Hilarious 5* Like Cadfael meets Clouseau 5* Another hysterical masterpiece. Very good indeed, brilliant. BBC Not content with being King William's investigator of murder, and he is not content with that at all, Brother Hermitage is now having his trouble delivered. The floods of Derby wash up something very specific and there is only one monk for the job. But who would do that to an abbot? And where did he come from? Not only will Hermitage have to discover a killer, he'll also have to find a monastery where there is none. Perhaps some detestable monks will be able to throw light on the situation. Could the Norman obsession with record-keeping turn out to be useful? At least this murder is only a short walk away, and Hermitage, Wat and Cwen traipse through a soggy countryside to discover more about monks and monasteries than the weavers ever wanted to know. The 30th - yes 30th Chronicle of Brother Hermitage continues the theme of a medieval detective monk who really shouldn’t be

Murder 'Midst Merriment

Author: Howard of Warwick

Publisher: The Funny Book Company

Published: 2023-07-24

Total Pages: 234

ISBN-13: 1913383547

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Amazon top 20 best seller, Howard of Warwick delivers a Medieval Crime Comedy for our times. Of course, if anyone is unable to keep up with the times, it’s going to be Brother Hermitage. Now nominated for the CWA 2024 Historical Dagger award. Influencers, the nature of truth, state propaganda? And all nearly 1,000 years ago. Some things never change. When conflicting versions of the Norman Conquest are offered to the people of Derby, Brother Hermitage is in the audience to hear both sides. But, if Brother Hermitage is in the audience, someone is at serious risk of ending up less alive than they used to be. As Wat and Cwen the weavers point out, Brother Hermitage, the King’s Investigator of murder, after all, was standing right there when the deed was done. How can he not know who did it? Well, he will simply have to investigate as he always does, and the facts will be revealed. Unfortunately, everyone seems to have their own version of the facts and they can’t all be right. When even the liars are lying about their lies, and the people who know the truth don’t know that they know it, things are bound to be confusing. But someone has been shot. With a bow and arrow, a rare item in Anglo-Saxon Derby. Someone must have seen something. And in this case, everyone is talking. They just aren’t saying anything reliable. Never fear. Brother Hermitage will knock this investigation on the head. Unless someone knocks him on the head first, of course. Non mitterent nuncio, as Hermitage might say. Don’t shoot the messenger. Oh, too late. The 29th Chronicle of Brother Hermitage carries the familiar warning; if you like your historical mysteries serious and sombre, look away now. 5* Hilarious medieval murder 5* Another hysterical masterpiece 5* Good humour and funny, clever characters

A Murder for Brother Hermitage

Author: Howard of Warwick

Publisher: The Funny Book Company

Published: 2018-09-24

Total Pages: 257

ISBN-13: 1999895967

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It's more medieval mystery for people who laugh. Number 1 best selling, prize winning Howard of Warwick is back with volume 12 of the Chronicles of Brother Hermitage; "this time it's historical." Norman England is still full of real people; the incompetent, the hopeless and the just plain useless. But what’s this? At the monastery of his friend Abbot Abbo, a young, naive and bookish monk is killed in chapter 1? Surely not? It can’t be. The death of this particular monk sets off a chain of events that’s tangled to say the least. The news must be taken to Derby, home of Wat, erstwhile weaver of pornographic tapestry and Cwen, fierce and independent weaver in her own right. Then the death must be investigated, of course it must, and the guilty held to account. But the guilty seem to be queuing up in this case, and show not the least sign of shame, let alone guilt. In fact, they’re quite proud of what they've done. Brother Hermitage, the King’s Investigator, made a lot of enemies over the last 11 books. It was bound to go horribly wrong sooner or later. "Horrible" and "wrong" crop up quite often where Brother Hermitage is concerned. But, you need to read the book if you want to make any sense of all this; even then, there are no guarantees. Some people have said "hilarious", some have said "very, very funny," others have said "stupid" (the good and bad kind). Nearly 100,000 people have succumbed to the nonsense that is Howard of Warwick. 1,000 reviews, Amazon number 1s, 5* littering the floor of the scriptorium? There must be something in it. (May require prior reading of course HW101: medieval detection, the Hermitage years)

Return to The Dingle

Author: Howard of Warwick

Publisher: The Funny Book Company

Published: 2022-12-23

Total Pages: 264

ISBN-13: 1913383490

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Medieval Crime Comedy is now a thing. With multiple No 1 Best Sellers and nearly a quarter of a million sales, Howard of Warwick continues to muck about with the detective monk. But this one is a very funny sort of medieval mystery. Brother Hermitage wants there to be a murder? This can’t be right. In all of his previous excursions, he’s been pretty meticulous about avoiding the things. When an instruction arrives from the Normans to find a missing person, Hermitage seems keen to shirk his duty. At least that’s a familiar theme. But he’s the King’s Investigator, he doesn’t do missing persons, that must be someone else’s job. Knowing where the person may have gone missing might explain the trepidation. The clue’s in the title; De’Ath’s Dingle. That grim and dreadful monastery, which looms over Hermitage’s life like a falling loom, is calling him back. Perhaps he can try not listening. It will only be full of the old familiar faces, up to their old revolting tricks. And if someone has gone missing there, all hope is gone. But a shadow gathers in the west and the monastery is falling into darkness. Well, more darkness than normal. With Wat, Cwen and Bart, Hermitage tramps his reluctant path back to the Dingle, always hopeful that someone might be murdered on the way as a distraction. When he finally gets there, things are not at all as they should be. They should be truly awful, but this is simply peculiar. There is obviously something going on. Hermitage can see it, so why doesn’t anyone else believe him? And even when there is a murder, it doesn’t help much. Previous volumes have received comment. “Very good indeed, brilliant” BBC 5* Everything has to stop for a Hermitage book! Hilariously funny. 5* Yet another hilarious adventure for Brother Hermitage and his companions. 5* All the tales of the adventures of Hermitage the monk are genuinely funny and contain an intriguing plot

Hermitage, Wat and Some Druids

Author: Howard of Warwick

Publisher: The Funny Book Company

Published: 2015-12-20

Total Pages: 281

ISBN-13: 0992939372

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Brother Hermitage is at it again - this time with druids. Is it a murder mystery? Is it a thriller? Is it just something gone horribly wrong? When his nemesis, the Norman conqueror Le Pedvin orders him to Wales, Brother Hermitage knows it is going to go wrong. He's had a prophecy it's going to go wrong. And from his first steps on the road it strides firmly in that direction. Brother Hermitage, Wat, weaver of pornographic tapestry and Cwen, weaver in her own right and the fiercest of the lot, are commanded to find one dead Norman in the whole of Wales - as usual under pain of death. Add to that some treasure and a druid curse or two, and we have the recipe for a laugh out loud historical tale like no other. (Apart from the other Chronicles of Brother Hermitage) It's all complicated enough, but when what seems like the whole of the country wants to join in, things get very messy. And then there are the druids, and stone circles, and sacrifices.... "he who has laughter on his side has no need of proof" Theodore Adorno